Okay… Seems counter intuitive but I can see where this may be true.
At its heart, perfectionism is rooted in feelings of shame and inadequacy.
Those of us who suffer from it are afraid that we’re not worthy of being respected and loved for our natural, unedited selves. There are many reasons why this happens, but the consequence is that we always feel the need to justify ourselves and our actions.
We also feel we must prove ourselves, over and over again; we’re never good enough just as we are.
Talk about a recipe for depression, stress, and burnout. (Well no wonder!)
A 2008 Psychology Today article titled “Pitfalls of Perfectionism” states, “[T]he biggest problem with perfection may be that it masks the real secret of success in life. Success hinges less on getting everything right than on how you handle getting things wrong.”
That is totally me. What if I REALLY got that?? I’d be unstoppable. I’ve been criticized most of my life mostly by my mother and of course that mother criticism is everything. My opinion of myself is basically my mothers opinion of me. It puts a pallor over all parts of my life. Despite everything I have accomplished I still go right back to that poor opinion of me that my mother has. Which she can’t let me forget nor stop bringing up. It is absolutely something I have to work on.
No, i’m not really worried about her reading this because she already knows this. That is why we are not really speaking right now. Read on in this interesting article.